I’m 24 years old and I have two kids. When I was in high school I was very outgoing, smart, and was mildly popular. I had hopes and dreams to go to college, travel the world, and just be a free, person. I was very career minded and independent. Even though I wanted a good life and family, I was perfectly willing to put it on the back burner for what desires I really had.

In my senior year in high school, I started dating a man that would cause this all to change. He was polar opposite of me in every way. I came from a wealthier family, was education, never did drugs or even curse; not because I was stuck up but because I didn’t think smoking and cursing were lady like. He on the other hand was in and out of facilities, had no education, came from a poor family and used more drugs but the time I met him at 17 than most people do in a lifetime.

For some reason he seemed to have a strange power over me and I quickly fell for him. When I look back now, the red flags were here, I just didn’t see them. I thought that he was a great guy that treated me well but just had some past issues, kind of a hard life thing. I soon found myself in dangerous waters.

I knew from about day two that he had anger and aggression issues but he soon started to hit me. Kick me. Slap me. Punch me. Spit at me. Break my things. Destroy our home. It started out light and he even cried the first time he slapped me and told me that he loved me, was sorry and promised to never do it again. Did I mention that he is a boxer?! These hits were not soft and when I was 7 months pregnant with out second child he beat me bloody one night and after a neighbor called the police, I ended up in the hospital with a broken finger I got while trying to defend his powerful blows.

I haven’t finished college; haven’t even come close even though I am still attending. I don’t have a job so we live off of my student loans. He doesn’t work. Doesn’t clean the house. Doesn’t worry about money or paying bills. He says he has a shoulder injury that prevents him from doing almost everything; playing with out kids, lifting things, working around the house, cooking, cleaning, working a job, anything you can think of he can’t do…yet he can beat me. Its like he has a free walk through life. He is very envious of women and the way we are. I tell him that he wishes he was a woman. He thinks men have it hard these days and women are like little devils that get whatever they want. He says he wants to have the bronze of a man and get treated like a women since according to him us women have it all real easy.

I want to cry all the time and I want to leave but I have to way out. I know that people say that there is always a way out but for someone in the position I am in, you know that you can’t get rid of someone who doesn’t want to go. I’ve requested restraining orders and he breaks them like its nothing. I call the police and he somehow turns it around to make me be in the wrong. I’ve tried to leave several times and he eventually finds me.

I’m not asking how to get out or for someone to tell me the obvious fact that I need to get out. I’m just asking if anyone out there can relate to me and my story? I know that I am a fighter and a strong person but for some reason I can’t seem to leave. If you can relate to my story, please let me know how you got the strength to finally leave! What plans did you set into motion to get yourself and kids out if you have them? Any positive advise is welcomed.

And a last piece of information, I am very lonely. I don’t have any friends anymore and I’m not allowed to go anywhere. If I leave my house, I am expected to take my kids because he needs a break and I’m the woman so I need to take care of them. I never get a free moment or the ability to do something that I am interested in.

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Filed under: Senior Independent Living Facilities

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